Monday, November 25, 2013

Pop Dogma

We watch films, read books, listen to music and feel... Very few people escape the luxury of cathartic emotion when engaging in artistic forms. I love to laugh out loud or cry hysterically in cahoots with a character or a situation that has nothing to do with me or is a mirror image of my own life. Either way, it provides a release we often require to get through the day. Many people claim that perfectly happy endings can shelter us from cruel reality, or harsh truths are too severe for our delicate psyches to witness without consequence. The poetic musings of pop films or T.V. sitcoms provide formulaic recipes that cannot be followed in real life. But why not? I myself tend to prefer grand heroics and idealism to tortured souls and melancholy. Don't get me wrong, there is absolutely a place for both. But in a world where things are often tricky at best, and possessing a psyche that does greater damage to myself than any external force can do, I will take my wisdom from sources that speak to me, however nonsensical...

Over the past few days, or possibly for my entire life, I have been wondering about many things. You meet people whose place is unsure, you go on adventures very much so uncharted, and you think about the things you most desire or fear. Love is a pinnacle for many and I am no exception. Amidst lingering heartbreak, there have been many random pop quotes that have leapt into my head of late, perhaps creating a lifeline to follow and provide the next step...

Adam Sandler said in the movie "Funny People"... "There is always the one girl out there, though, the one that got away. Guys have that... and serial killers have that, the one that got away. 'I had her, the trunk was lined with garbage bags, and then she got away.'" Except that many women don't have that. We hold onto love until it is finished and we don't look back. That doesn't mean there aren't attempts to move on or that years later someone can resurface, but while men are often content to compartmentalize and allow someone to walk silently into the night, I for one know that I love fiercely and full of bias until I am done. The end result may be desirable but the route can be tragically difficult... As the romantic comedy "The Wedding Date" suggests, “Every woman has the exact love life she wants”. Well, sorry ladies, but I sort of believe this is true. I look around at strong, confident, independent women ready to love and be loved without question and I see wonderfully inspiring relationships. That doesn't mean you can't meet people or try relationships or feel confident or have success under other circumstances. But I admit myself that unless I want to fall casually into a co-dependent or completely unbalanced relationship, something I have never been able to do, there are things yet to be done before my Prince Charming can sweep me away... Or rather, before I tell him loud and clearly that it's time to collect his profoundly miraculous prize ; )... I tend to dwell on possibilities rather than realities, relishing in fantasy instead of embracing what is tangible. Considering what could have been or should have been, what beauty felt like instead of what it will feel like again. The concrete and the creative, the imagination and the absolute are all necessary. We can keep our memories as brilliant pieces of who we are, but as Carrie Bradshaw so aptly puts it, "Maybe the past is like an anchor holding us back. Maybe, you have to let go of who you were to become who you will be."

If the pop dogma floating through my head is considered crap by some, then so be it. If it puts into perspective thoughts previously disconnected and makes its way into my writing, than not only has it achieved its artistic goal of making an impact and being remembered, but it has found its way into the unfolding dreams of a random wanderer. Such is the hope for all artists and soul-lovers.

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